Battle of Genders...

I've been asked to comment upon feminism. Lets see...

While I was a kid, I thought that my brother could get away with a lot of things that I wasn't allowed to and it bothered me being a girl and not being able to do whatever I wanted all the time.

As a teenager, guys were the things to hate, do everything you can to hurt them in as many ways possible. Reason was the so many of my friends were crushed when their engagements didnt lead to marriage, or the guy who liked them dumped them for someone else. Faithfulness was something that dogs displayed only.

Then, I went to University and started working. Here is when i had to interact with guys everyday, and it was a rough time for me. My brother used to get a lot of attitude from me, see whenever, a guy would say or do something, Id come home and yell at my brother, and all this time, he didnt know why he was being yelled at. Once he had to pick me up from where my point dropped me off, and while I was waiting, this other guy shows up in a car and offered to give me a lift. Fumming, I waited and when my brother finally came, I gave him a piece of my mind.

Guys think it is so cool being a guy, they can get away with passing comments at passerbys, teachers, girls, whatever. It is lovely to talk (read brag) about the number of girlfriends that they have, and every guy thinks (or fantasizes) about being the Romeo for his (1, 2, 3, 4, or more) Juliet(s).

Its a male-dominated society, so when I was asked to comment about feminism back in University, I said I dont think Men and Women are equal, Women are far superior.

I was so naive.

Then started job, and thought, oh, men and women are equal. You get all this "equal opportunity employer" and all the loads of c*** when you enter the field. Hello, wait, then again, there were endless debates about the postings on the offical bulletin board regarding gender. IT happened so much, and so often and it got so nasty, that all such postings were banned. And we all know, what happens when something is banned. It gets talked about more and more and more.

My class fellows (some of them) also became my colleagues at work, and one day, one of them casually commented to my face, "all girls who work are immoral". Upon realizing that I was staring at him, he said, but its true.

We were asked never to discuss our pays with our colleagues, and i was the last to know what everyone's else pay was and was the first to protest against it. Guys were getting paid more, because they stayed at office longer. So we stayed back a bit and proved the survery that guys were staying back longer BECAUSE the office had airconditioning, uninterrupter internet for free, guys hanging around, someone or the other willing to pay for the sutta (cig), khaapaa (grub), network games, and a ride home. Some guys were living in the office, and getting termed at being the best employee as they were so DEDICATED to the office.

So the bubble burst, how could women be superior, when they were far far inferior.

Then I got married and saw the world in a different light, as there were much more expectations from me and I had gained a whole new collection of family/relatives/family friends, and at the same time, being with the man Allah had paired me with.

Then the idea became this, men and women are equal, but men are superior as they are providers. Conditional acceptance was hard to chew, but met with an ok, chalay ga.

Then a became a mom, and my mother commented, it is a wonderful thing that men dont get to give birth, otherwise, they'd sit home and do nothing after having a kid. This was in context of the maternity leave that (working) women get.

Then for the first time, it dawned on me that mothers are better than fathers, because they get thrice the reward fathers get, yet, they get the similar blame if their child does something wrong.

I've come to terms with it now, but this coming to terms came with a lot of acid influx, heart burn, and mental anguish. A lot of bad words, tons of useless blame games.

Go down this road if you want to, but Im at peace with the fact that men and women are different and it is not wise to try to compare apples and oranges. We just have to learn to deal with whatever life throws at us and not generalize what men are or what women are depending on who we know.

There are lots of wonderful men in this world and women make this world a wonderful place to live. Life has a purpose and so lets not waste it over who is better. Make yourself the best and the hope someone notices and tells others about it :)

Peace!